Ah! The deadly About Our Company page.

Almost always, it puts the resume before the person. Jargon filled and loaded to the gills with credentials, press references, publication notes, awards, accolades, etc. This is important stuff for establishing authority—but is this how you introduce yourself to a new acquaintance? By reciting your resume? Well, if you are an actor, maybe so. How about loosening your power tie, sharing a little bit about who you really are and inviting them into a conversation?

Client’s original piece (237 words):

The Team at Surrounds Landscaping

Barry Schneider and Howard Cohen launched Surrounds in 2002 because they knew Howard’s creative vision and Barry’s proven ability to run a successful business would complement each other perfectly. They hand picked their staff from an elite group of people they knew had the abilities and skills to make Surrounds a premier landscaping company.

Today, Surrounds can boast 100 percent of their core team members have been with the company since its beginning, giving our customers the benefit of a well oiled, experienced machine. Together we have learned the artistic skills required to build the award winning environments that is the “Surrounds Signature”.

You may be wondering what makes the Surrounds Team different from any other landscape company.  From the very start, one of our registered Landscape Architects (LA) will design the ideal environment for your home. Once the design is finalized, the project is turned over to one of our experienced Project Managers to work hand in hand with the LA.  Together they will build the custom outdoor environment of your dreams… in essence, we are a true  design/build company. Next, our jobs are built by our own in-house crews which are made up of stone masons, carpenters, landscapers, and lighting specialists. The final step is the walk through with the LA, Project Manager, and customer to ensure that Surrounds has achieved our goal of creating another “Raving Fan” customer.

SightLine’s revised piece (206 words):

The first thing you will learn about the Surrounds Landscape Architects is that…

People love the work we do.
Work is not the right word to describe it. Yes, we sketch, draw, erase and draw again. We get our hands dirty and we sweat. But it feels like play. We play hard to surprise and delight our clients. We can’t help it.

The process of imagining, designing and sculpting your home site into an inspiring outdoor environment is everything to us. So we push it. We jump overboard to make the magic happen. We’ll grab you by the hand and take you with us. To say that our clients are satisfied customers would be inaccurate. They are raving fans.

[Insert block quote for a two sentence testimonial and link to Houzz reviews here]

Our attention to every nuance of every detail delivers a landscape design and construction process that is carefree for the client, and with an end result that takes your breath away.

And it doesn’t end there. Sometime, long after a project is complete, you will step into your yard and feel something, see something in the landscape that you never noticed before. You will think to yourself, “wow”. That is the Surrounds Signature.